Here we go....again!

Here's some pics from our recent vaca to N. Conway, NH. I love this kid :) We went to the waterslides today for the first time and the giggle he did the whole way down each time (which was at least 50 times) makes all this bullshit worth while....i get a pretty awesome prize at the end.

So here is the long awaited update. I got my period on 6/16... did 100mg of Clomid 3-7 went in for my HSG on thursday 6/24 (all clear, and it wasnt too bad..got alittle dizzy when they put in the ballon and everyone kept saying "you ok, you ok"...made me nervous but it was fine.) Then friday on day 10 i went in for follie check and i had 2 follies on my left side (same side i have my tube YAY!) and they measured 15.5 and 23.5 so ill most likely release both. My e2 was 353.

Ive been taking OPK's every 4 hours the past 2 days and got a + last night (sun) and this morning (mon). Pete and i got to business on Friday night, sunday morning and this morning im gonna try to get one more time out of him and then we wait. I know ill O today since im bloated and have pain on my left side...so if we get to one more time either tonight or tomorrow am then we did all we can do.

I start my medrol, heparin and progesterone in 3 days. I go in for my prog check next monday. Then ill start Prednisone until a baby with a heartbeat is detected.

I will get pregnant its just will it work with this protocol? Hoping so....

The Plan

So after i vented yesterday i realized i hadnt updated to give my next plan and what happened after that ultrasound. You can pretty much guess it was all over very shortly after that. I started bleeding on 5/17. The doctor wants me to wait a month to give my body a bit of a break (or maybe my sanity). So here i sit waiting for my period. I dont even know if i ovulated yet....ug!

Once i get my period i call and get 100mg of Clomid and schedule a HSG to check my lone tube (i have never had this test before). The rationale was i get pregnant so why check it but with 1 ectopic and one suspected ectopic they want to make sure everything looks good. The clomid will also help me ovulate on my one "good" side each month too.

Im staying on my 4mg Folic Acid, BA, Vitamin E, PNV and im guessing Lovenox (im going to ask for heparin since thats what i was on with Jack, even though i know its the same thing, im superstitious.)

Our major change (besides having sex rather then getting poked and prodded) is starting prednisone (medrol) after ovulation and staying on it until we see a baby with a heartbeat then weaning off of it....so itll probebly be until week 10 or so.

I do have a +ANA antibody so this, BA and heparin will most likely work ( it better!).

So youll hear from me once my period finally decides to show!

Sick.of.it.

I feel like screaming!! Everywhere i turn someone is knocked up! This past week we went to Storyland with Jack and i saw all over the place women pregnant with their 2-3 yr old with them...and there i was just FAT since i stress/pity eat (which im going on WW monday). But im seriously getting SICK OF THIS!! This was NOT suppose to be this hard this time around WTF!!! It is a year ago this month we decided to have another baby and hear iam still going through this hell! I felt desperate to have Jack and i havent felt that way this time around until this past week.

Im breaking down, i just want to complete my family, feel whole and be D-o-N-E with this!

Im happy for everyone that is preganant, believe me. But it starts to get disheartening when people email you and need advice on how to cope with trying or going through a miscarraige and one after another they get pregnant again and have healthy babies while your still sitting here trying, coping, wishing, praying, crying and living a life that doesnt feel complete. I love what i have and i am TRULY greateful but, im having a moment and im pissed!

I just want another baby and everyone with their baby bumps, sonograms pictures, and pregnancy announcements can go suck an egg!